rainbowlounge | There's A Direct Connection Between My Love and Inspiration

There's A Direct Connection Between My Love and Inspiration

There's been some discussion over at

dingsi's about how writers relate to their characters. It turns out, a lot of people talk to their casts in their head. I made the point over at the original post that this isn't something I've ever experienced. I talk to myself to check dialog for readability, but that's about it. The idea is just absolutely fascinating to me. How does it work? What's it like? Do these things get violent? I don't know. But, I want to.

So! Maybe you'd like to demonstrate FOR SCIENCE?

Suggested Areas To Cover
-What is the mental space in which this phenomenon occurs?
-Who starts these discussions?
-Is there action or movement?
-What is the contents of an average conversation?
--If you could relay one close to its original word forms, I would be especially interested in that.
-How do you resolve disputes?
-Is the sensation pleasing or otherwise?
-Other cool stuff you need to tell me.

I'm not going to expect you to do this and then not give anything back. I am kind of a writer and writers can fictionalize events (hopefully, and most of the time). So, while the following discussion never actually happened to me, I was able to make a point about writer angst and changing plans with it, which may be relatable. It contains spoilers for Jealous of Roses [what's NOT going to happen + a character explicitly stating something he doesn't say out loud for ages], an F-bomb, and a pedestrian visual representing the inside of my head. I don't imagine it's real complicated up in there.

Just because I did mine as a script doesn't mean you have to. Get creative!

Scene: a sunny spring day in a field of dandelions. For some reason, there is a coffee table in the middle of it.

SWL- a round, dark-haired woman with owlish spectacles -sits at the table. She has a glass of iced coffee and an 80's IBM multicolor typewriter with which she continues to fiddle. As she types, the words appear, but gradually fade away, leaving only a strand of watercolor hues and the occasional and, or, the, or typo.

Siebenkas: *clears his throat* Excuse me, I-...

SWL: *shrieks* The FUCK!

Siebenkas: ...moment of your time?

*the breeze provides the only sound through the ensuing awkward silence*

SWL: Okaaay. Let's pretend nobody saw that. *turns back to the typewriter*

Siebenkas: As you wish.

SWL: Why are you /here/?

Siebenkas: I need to ask you something.

SWL: The Girl With No Name doesn't try to talk to me while I'm working. She's older than this dirt. /She/ could maybe possibly kinda get away with it. *waves her hand leftwards*

Siebenkas: *looks over to a chair in some nearby shade where sits a sprightly-looking girl kicking her heels against her chair rungs and grinning* That's, ah...

SWL: I'm used to it. Anyway, you're new. It would have to occur to you that you're kinda lacking in seniority and such. And you should have better sense than to do whatever it is you people do to show up here. So, just tell me- what?

Siebenkas: It's important.

SWL: *sidelong glance*

Siebenkas: I think perhaps you brought this on yourself. Making me the way you did.

SWL: Sisu.

Siebenkas: Pardon?

SWL: Talking to myself. Go on.

Siebenkas: It became impossible for me not to come.

SWL: Well... *lists to one side* The good news is I can see that.

Siebenkas: And the bad news?

SWL: My seeing that's probably not gonna get you anywhere. But, since you came this far- chair? Coffee? Benedryl?

Siebenkas: *shakes his head and sits down in the grass a respectable distance from SWL*

SWL: *looks at him over her specs*

Siebenkas: I know it's your purpose that the other courtiers and I become sexually open with one another.

SWL: One purpose anyway.

Siebenkas: To few exceptions. But, I don't want that.

SWL: Oh. I thought about you not wanting that. If you don't, you'll come off as a prude to the other typewriter operators. Plus, I thought it was ageist of me to leave you out.

Siebenkas: *brows knit* *sighs* I appreciate your consideration, but you need to understand I'm not much concerned about how I appear to people I'm incapable of knowing.

SWL: Figures. OK, so no more porn for you?

Siebenkas: I didn't... no.

SWL: *hums and glances around the way she does with people on the phone who ask what to put for their street address*

Siebenkas: *looks off into the field* I love her.

SWL: You're in love with Nene?

Siebenkas: I don't want anyone but her.

SWL: Yeahhh, that's not gonna work. She's poly. Y'know if I had to put her in a box, which I won't.

Siebenkas: She can be with whoever she wants. I wouldn't change that or take anything away from her.

SWL: But, /you/ aren't interested in guilt free sexyfuntiems with anyone else. That, umm... *nibbles cheek* That's not a point of view I can process with a quickness.

Siebenkas: *faint smile*

SWL: *nibble nibble*

Siebenkas: You seem surprised. But, I want to love and be loved and for other people to be able to love because of what I've done.

SWL: Bunnies would be a less cute motivation.

Siebenkas: I don't care about that either.

SWL: Guess not. *huff* OK, so, I'm not real comfortable messing around with a woman's plotline to give a guy what he wants. I mean, anything I do different with you impacts the others. Just especially Nene.

Siebenkas: That's... that's true. But, would she suffer because of it?

SWL: *noncommittal noise*

Siebenkas: If she would, don't do it. Pretend I was never here.

SWL: *snicker* Oh, you're all gonna hurt, one way or another. But, if I had to change things now? You /especially/.

Siebenkas: For the sake of equilibrium?

SWL: Not really.

Siebenkas: Vengeance for my transgression? Or, am I proving myself to you? That I'm capable of loving her no matter what you do to me?

SWL: Oh, I know that last part's true. This is about keeping the other typewriter operators amused. And me liking gay porn a lot.

Siebenkas: *sighs* I'm not going to beg, but... please. Let me stay this way. I want to know I can be there for her, even if she never loves me back.

SWL: I reserve the right to make you bonk other people in the AUs.

Siebenkas: *gets just slightly wide-eyed* After all that, you're agreeing.

SWL: Do /not/ thank me.

Siebenkas: *starts to say something* *sighs in relief* *grabs SWL's hand and kisses it*

SWL: !

Siebenkas: I won't. Not ever. I'll just do my best *smiles* to be entertaining. *and with that, he picks himself out of the grass and walks off into the field*

SWL: *resumes typing*

SWL: *has a sip of her coffee*

SWL: Wait a minute, how'd he find out about the Great Poly Plottwist?

Girl With No Name: You do kind of have an entire species of morally challenged telepaths running around in the Not Exactly Elysian Fields beyond the Void of Angry Parodies That Will Never Work.

SWL: I do, don't I?

*the wind picks up momentarily, sending dandelion fluff into the air*

SWL: Worth it.

Oh, and if anyone recognizes the title of this post, we should totally go dancing sometime.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Out of curiosity, do those of us who identify as multiple and act as scribes for other people count in this? I'm never sure if I count or not within the writing community when it comes to this sort of thing.

Absolutely. My curiosity has no bounds whatsoever and I would love to hear your thoughts on the topic.

How does it go? That's...hard to explain.

Wait, no it's not. It's just unusual. It's unusual to explain because either you know ro you don't. There's only a little bit of crossover, at least for e and it's odd. So no, it's not hard, it's just not something I do.

We work as a team, I'm the one who takes everything down, who learns how to put things into pretty words and wrap them up in a bow. Other people though, they're the ones who tell the stories, who live the lives that I place on a screen.

They tell me their secrets and, after I ask permission, I tell other people.

We do it in a space we've all dubbed the Inn. it has doors that people pass through to get back to their lives. I have a lot of people who come in and out, who have lives outside of the time they spend with me. That's how they get their stories. I don't get everyone's stories as soon as they walk in, it's a matter of building trust and camaraderie.

We're all in this head together, at least for a while, so why not exchange tales.

Sometimes I get stories to make me feel better, sometimes I get stories because they understand that I need to tell them, that when I can't make up my own (which I sometimes do, admittedly, I make up settings and ideas more than I make up actual plot) and sometimes they aren't telling em at all. Sometimes I easedrop in on other conversations and I hear stories that way.

I always ask permission before I tell a story to more than a few people. I make sure that i have the right to tell the tale because most of them aren't mine. Sometimes I feel bad, exploiting others lives for entertainment but, at the same time, there's something to be said for the stories themselves. They might need to find someone, might need to be told and the teller may not be willing to do it themselves.

That's where I come in.

This may not be how it works with everyone and hell, sometimes there are varations on how it works with me, but htat's the gist of it.

Thank you VERY much for taking the time to write all of that! It is much appreciated.

I have some questions. If they cannot be answered or if you would prefer not to answer them, please don't feel obliged.

First of all- not trying to be flippant here, but this sounds like fun to me. Keeping in mind that if someone dumps a jar of beads in front of me and tells me to sort them, that would be something I'd get into. I can def. see how the Inn situation could get angsty and unfun and bothersome, but, in general, do you enjoy your time there?

Are there people at the Inn that you avoid or don't want to talk to after a certain point? Conversely, is there anyone you want to see, say, that only comes in rarely?

Does anyone ever argue with you, or at least disagree?

Do you tell the Inn people stories too, or are the rolls always set that you're writing, they're talking?

Is the Inn itself set in form or can it change?

The questions are fine! I would not have brought anything up if I didn't feel like answering questions and I feel that, with a healthy exchange of information and conversation, everyone can learn so much.

In general, it's a safe place. It's a place for me to go when I can't handle the world, it's a place that I find refuge in and others do as well. It's a shared space for all of us who share this body or come around on at least a semi-regular basis. People have rooms there, I have a place where I curl up. People have friends, both from their own universe and others, and it's generally an interesting place to be.

There are definitely people who come around who I would rather not. Sadie is a good example. She's... not a very nice person and while we have a few not-so-nice types she is also violent and her influence over the rest of us is so, so far from wanted. I know her story in bits and pieces but talking to her makes me uncomfortable and I don't really want to give her a reason to come around, so I don't. This is the case with a few different people but not many.

As for those who I would love to come around more often, I would say that honor goes to Delia's crew. I would love for anyone in her universe to come around more often but they rarely do. She has an obligation to her world and doesn't often take advantage of the doors she finds that let her come to see the rest of us. She will on occasion and I love talking to her and listening to her sing for us but it's a rare treat.

There are definitely arguments from how we should present the body (I am in the process of dyeing the hair blue and there are big Talks about presentation), to what we eat, to what stories get told. We are a collective of people, despite me being the main fronter. Even that's not true, Nick and William, members who also belong to systems, front pretty regularly too and The Devil makes Three kids have been over the shoulder and/or fronting a lot because they've been telling me stories a lot lately.

I sometimes make up stories. Not all the time but every now and then. Especially when I am talking to certain people who really appreciate stories. I have some folks who really enjoy hearing stories told by other people, so I'll give them tales but not everyone is interested in hearing stories, they're just interested in going about their lives. For them, I just prod them into telling me the interesting bits and leave them to their own devices.

The Inn itself very much changes and a part of it's attributes is that it is easily shifted and molded into what we want. For a while it was a in the woods, then a high rise, now it's in it's current state.

This is all so new and interesting to me. You know, I always figured other writers were being colorful and metaphorical with the "Character X is not behaving" comments. Wrong does not begin to cover it. And it's so cool that I was wrong. Ya learn something every day.

You know, it really, honestly sounds like you feel you're providing a service to most of these individuals. I just... I cannot approach that in my own writerly business. The closest I can get is teaching people how to bead and that's still miles off from what you're experiencing.

Your descriptions of what's going on read like a story in and of themselves.

I have got to send you the story behind How They Came To Be sometime. But. Okay.

I've had Johnny in my head since November 28, 2006. (We wound up looking up exact dates last night.) Except for three weeks last April, he has not shut up for an appreciable length of time.

For me, with all these guys, it's background chatter. They talk just about all the time, to me or to each other, and it's about anything and everything. I came across the name of a car earlier and image-searched it. Turns out, it's quite the sexy sports car; I got a chorus of "WANT" just about instantly. They do that all the time.

I'll be having a conversation with someone, and I get commentary on it. I start writing something, and I write it pretty darn fast because I'm getting comments and direction as I go. Interestingly, when I talk about them to someone, it's a lot more thinking abstractly than getting it from them. Hm. Example. Okay, this one actually happened:

I was in the shower, washing my hair, and considering a fic I was stuck on. I'd gotten past the major hurdle of writing the starting event already.

Me: So, Torey, where's it go from here?

Torey: I want to talk to Johnny.

Me: If you talk to Johnny, he's going to reinforce your point of view, and that's not something I want to have. I don't care if you go talk to Angela, but don't talk to Johnny.

Torey: Nope. I want to talk to Johnny.

Me: *rinse my hair* You are not talking to Johnny.

Johnny, background: *watching with a grin* An' ya think I'm stubborn...

Both: Shut up, Johnny.

Me: Seriously, if you talk to Johnny, this is going in all kinds of directions I don't want.

Torey: Then it's not going anywhere. I'm not helping if I don't get to talk to Johnny, and we all know you hate writing when we're not helping because you feel like it's OOC. That's why Bruno hasn't been able to shoot David.

David: Never going to fucking happen.

Me: *gets out of shower* David, go away. We're not dealing with your wussiness. Torey. Come on. Not Johnny.

Torey: I guess you're not getting this done. Ever.

Me: AAAAAAARGH WHY ARE YOU FUCKERS SO STUBBORN?!

Me: *finally downstairs* OKAY TOREY. If I let you talk to Johnny, will you please talk to Nic or Is or Angela after?

Torey: I can live with that.

Me: FINALLY. GOD. *resists smacking him*

My head is like that all the time. There's usually background chatter going on, them talking to each other or commenting on my life; Nic and Johnny are the loudest and most prone to interjecting in my day-to-day conversations and thoughts, actually addressing me. I don't have anything visual, though.

This is distinct from hallucinations, which I've had. Auditory hallucinations are external to me; it's like they come to my ears and are processed that way. (Best way I have to explain it.) The guys talking is an internal thing; I "hear" them like any other thought I have. It's just that they have their own personalities and stories to tell. I can't imagine writing and not having them, just as you probably can't imagine having them.

I should add that I sort of visualize them having a space to hang out, a bunch of comfy couches and chairs and such. I have consistent ones--Nic and Johnny, Torey most of the time, David and Connecticuters often--and others who show up, but they're all welcome. Except Leo and Daria. Even Katya is welcome before them.

I think I would pour bleach in my ear before I let Leo hang out in my head :D. Katya at least has MANNERS.

Odd question- did you pick this visual for the hangout or did it come around in other ways?

I picked the spring day with dandelions for my head because I have a strong sense memory of a certain delicious spring that I go back to all the time for writerly purposes.

We used to joke about having a velvet rope between our minds because we were so on the same track. My visualization of my space was, even then, a hangout like that; Sara's has always been a common room with games, a library, and so forth. Mine's a place to chat. Hers is more fun. =P

Seriously, we cowrite things, they READ MY MIND. Blatantly. I think of a detail, and bam, it's included in their next part of the story.

There's not even a velvet rope anymore. =P

You do it to me, too!

It's a product of knowing each other so long and having such a handle on the characters, I think. And we know each other's writing styles so well that we know what fits the next section, lol.

I am doing my damnedest to imagine having this sort of thing go on in my head. It's so absolutely fascinating to me! But, I do realize I'm always going to be imagining. Of course, I'm not going to hang out on a ship stranded anywhere in the pacific circa 1660 or go on a hacky slashy swordtiems adventure, but I can imagine those too. And, somebody already did the research those (perhaps, in the latter case).

I have seen the Chorus of Want Phenomenon before! It gets talked about a lot in BJD fandom. Only, in your case, no one spent $200 on wee doll shoes. In that respect, the mechanics of you and your characters is much safer unto wallets and lead to more fic. Which is good, unlike wallet death.

But, they honest to fuck ARGUE with you about plotpoints? And you have about a dozen AUs, besides a cast of 19 siblings in the regular universe... Which characters debate with you. In the shower. Oh my HELL.

I mean, I have seen people say their characters argued with them before. In fact, I think I've seen you point this out before. But, there's saying X was arguing with me about this scene and there's Torey was being a bastard, holding your narrative hostage. Because he wanted to talk to Johnny. And David was being David to you. In the shower.

*is trying really, really hard to conceptualize of having DAVID playing in the background like a Rolling Stones song stuck in her head*

THIS IS SO AWESOMELY OUTSIDE OF WHAT I KNOW THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SHARING. It's like goddamn string theory. In the shower. With DAVID.

The shower is actually an awesome place to get them started! There's nothing else going on (except, if I brought my laptop in the bathroom, there's music), so I can let my mind wander. If it's been mental chaos or mental fuzz, it all gets cleared, and they'll start talking about...whatever. It also happens as I'm drifting off to sleep. Both fics I posted today happened that way. I was in bed, nothing except some soothing music on, mind drifting in that pleasant pre-sleep way...and then Johnny started talking about tying up Matt. And Matt started contributing. I told them to keep it for morning, and Matt shut up. Johnny just switched topics, over to the other fic, for which I'd had the first line for three weeks. Michael joined on that one, the two of them set up how it went, and I had to get up and write it because I then knew it.

And then I had to write the Matt-and-Johnny one because Matt had it ready when I finished the Johnny-and-Michael one, and the words just poured out.

So I didn't sleep, but I added 5k to this year's word count.

I actually have fannish characters do the same thing, but it's not nearly as many. For instance, for SFBB, I decided I was getting them done one day. So I basically closed everything and got to business. One of them came fast (The Black Donnellys) because it had been building mentally, but I didn't have the character talking to me. The other, I had to be so in the POV dude's head that he got in my head, and it turned into a conversation.

Fortunately, my QBB is also his POV. He's being a pain in the ass about it, but when he starts talking, I can count on at least 2500 words at once, and he's given me two or three subplots so far. I'm iffy on a potential subplot and don't know where it's ending, but I do know he's into the idea. It's still weird, getting into a fannish character's head, but there you go.

I recall reading somewhere that falling water creates ions of a mildly intoxicating nature. If I could remember how it was suppose to work, I'd feel better about, you know, asserting that as fact, but for now it's a thing I possibly came across.

Well, if we have nothing else in common about how we go about writing, we've both been shaking out of almost sleep by That Which Must Be Written XD. Only I think of turns of phrase for jewelry boxes and you get a bunch of guys talking about tying each other up.

...lucky!

For that, and your most glorious wordcounts, for oh, they are most enviable. ^^

It's very much awesome if that's the case. I just know it's calming in some way and does often get them going, so showers are a go-to when foggy or chaotic. I don't remember if baths do the same or not.

I got a D/s fic and a tying up for amazing sex fic! I deemed it worth staying up. Your turns of phrase are gorgeous; you're quite lucky.

Scientific Research says a bath shuts things down, unlike a shower.

I visualize conversations between characters more than I visualize discussions I have with characters. I like to imagine my mind is this giant rec room type area. Bookshelves on all the walls, so high you need a ladder to reach the top shelves; there are couches, arm chairs, a fireplace; there's a collection of board games, a TV, a DVD/blu-ray player, a Wii; basically any form of entertainment you could want. And the characters hang out there, from all my canons, and chat. Sometimes even fanfic characters stop by (though they don't stick around nearly as long). I can envision these conversations, things that will never be stories but just...happen. Like Maria from PF having an amiable chat with Larry (fanfic character, from the show Burn Notice) about knives. Or Alex and Is sparring for practice in the corner. Or Sam hanging out with Rachel.

My...let's go with interactions with them are a lot more mental. It's more...I wonder something, and a character will pipe up with an answer. Or I'll be reading something, and a character will comment. Or I'll be writing something with the character doing or thinking something I wholly disapprove of, and I'll get this wave of annoyance in my head, because they know I don't agree with them. The first and last things can cause issues, if I get an answer I don't like or if the annoyance leads to stubbornness and refusing to cooperate. I generally try to out-stubborn them, but sometimes you have to compromise--e.g., let me finish this and I'll write x, y, or z next.

It's not really a full-on conversation as much as it is just...idk, communication? It's not like we're sitting somewhere and having a talk. It's like I'm thinking something, and I hear a response in the character's voice, and then I'm like, "Really? You couldn't have told me that happened before?" and then there's a mental shrug and a sort of, "Well, are you going to write it or what?"

I don't have to be the one to initiate it, though. I'll just be doing something entirely unrelated and get, "Hey, you should write this!" from one of them. Or I'll be treated to their commentary on whatever I'm reading/watching. Maria, being a sociopath, likes to talk when I'm watching Criminal Minds, for instance--it fascinates her. Sam will pipe up during Burn Notice because Jeffrey Donovan is his PB. If I see a cool weapon or car or something, I'll get Alex or Rachel or Is suddenly going, "Ooooh, want!" These digressions usually don't lead to fic, but they do fill in more about the characters in my head.

They also pop up in IM. For instance, Kelly and I have been chatting before and something will crop up that will get them talking, and for a minute or so, it's like we're suddenly RPing, because the characters are talking to each other. It's kind of weird and cool at the same time.

I don't know that I would consider the sensation pleasing, but it is...comforting, in a way. They're presences. I like having them there and knowing they always will be. It's something I can count on.

I hope that answers some of your questions?

That certainly does! Thank you very much for posting!

Aha! So you ALSO get the Chorus of Want! I've seen people in BJD fandom describe this. I did not know it related to OCs too. That is really cool, actually. It seems like it's a good way to sublimate prohibitively expensive awesome. And I bet you can have fun with it too!

Does it ever get bothersome when they interrupt your TV time and such?

I think it's really spiffy your characters can all occupy the same mental space without fist fights and such. Erm, anyway, you didn't mention fistfights. And out-stubborn- that's a relatable and useful concept for many, many aspects of writing, methinks XD.

I also really like that you're able to shift into RP so naturally because of your relationship (not sure if that's exactly the right word, but to me, this comes off as a relationship) with your cast. Does it help dialog to happen later that you can do this? Oh! And does the suddenness of this mental communication ever, say, not want to become dialog based on it's pure thoughtness?

Bottom line- this sounds like a good situation and I was glad to be able to read about it.

The Chorus of Want is a good name for it. I have spent a couple hours fake shopping because of it--just browsing sites for shit that my characters would totally buy. It's kind of fun/relaxing because, in the case of the Corlionis, they're rich motherfuckers, so I get to spend time looking at absurdly expensive clothes and cars and whatnot.

It's not really interruption! It's like watching TV with friends, and commenting on what's happening. Yeah, sometimes you all want to shut up for the really important bit, but you also have to snicker at a particularly ridiculous/funny line or think about some really intriguing scene, that kind of thing. It doesn't impede the experience at all. It makes it a lot more fun.

There aren't fistfights per se, because it's a bit like...you know how Hogwarts is warded so people can't Apparate in and out? It's like my mental room is warded so people can't full-on physically fight, lol. There are...mental rivalries, however. I've been working on my Queer Big Bang lately, which is Burn Notice fandom, so those characters have been visiting. Well, two of them, Sam and Larry...loathe each other, to put it mildly. So for awhile they were fucking with each other through me. Sam was talking for awhile, usefully, but then he stopped, so I decided to switch tracks and work on Larry's section...and Sam piped up again. But he wasn't talking for anything in particular. He was talking to derail my efforts writing Larry. Then, when I finally wrote Larry's section and decided to move on to Sam's, Larry started doing the same exact thing to Sam--talking for the hell of it to derail progress with Sam. And the other characters in my head started taking sides. Maria likes Larry; Alex is on Sam's side; Mark's eyeing them both speculatively; etc. For a brief period, it was playing out like that cliche of 90s sitcoms where two siblings/friends/whatever live in the same space and start fighting, so they put a giant line of tape down the center of the room to designate sides...all happening in my head. I would almost prefer fistfights, lol.

It goes both ways, actually. Sometimes, I get verbatim snips of dialogue that go directly into a story, and it all flows easily. Other times it's more like ideas that I have to translate into dialogue, and that takes more time. The worst is when they give me nothing but impressions and feelings. I know what they're thinking and what they mean, of course, but I don't have the faintest idea how to put it into, you know, useful narrative. That one gets frustrating very quickly. I often (mentally) yell at them for it, lol.

You also yell via IM. =P

THAT TOO.

I'm going to admit right off the bat that I write fanfic and original fic, and I experience chatty characters regardless of what I'm writing. IDK. It just seems to be my thing, that my characters chat to me anyway, no matter whether they're originally mine or not. I don't know if anyone else experiences it this way, but that's all I know, and that's the place I'm speaking from.

Chat happens in ... various forms. Not all of it's just mental, sometimes, it gets written down too. My fanfic novel The Glass House is full of me (as the narrator) arguing with Craig, one of the main characters, about plot and sex and other assorted things. But then, he was the sort of character who turned up during my first NaNo and declared he was my Muse whether I wanted one or not and proceeded to derail a perfectly planned out novel and turn it into a dystopian epic.

With characters like that, who act as 'muses' for me, they tend to have their Muse persona, in which they're fully aware of everything about everything and exist outside of a single universe. They're the ones who talk to me about plot ideas and I really should change that if I want something better.

They all approach me differently too. Craig is brash and just barges in with his Opinions. Charles, another character from that novel, is much more discreet and approaches me with much more humility, like maybe I might want to do this, if it's not too much trouble?

They don't all talk to me either. Some I've never heard from at all, whereas others seem to delight in breaking the fourth wall in fiction to talk to me. So, it really depends. More often than not, they're the ones who initiate it though. They come by and get my attention. Sometimes, it plays out like a scene in my head, with actions and whatnot. Other times, it's just conversation. It really depends. Disputes are resolved most of the time. Sometimes, I win, because I am the Author. Other times, they do give me better ideas and the piece is better for it.

I sometimes get that sort of thing from characters who aren't Muses though. Characters who look over my shoulder as I'm writing, and end up knowing everything I'm doing and make suggestions. Like, knowing about a particular set of gender-neutral pronouns that wasn't in existence during the time I'm writing about, but they like it anyway and ask for that. Good thing it's an alt. history, or I'd be in trouble. Though this character doesn't explicitly talk to me; I just notice they suddenly know things they shouldn't really know, if they're confined to the AU.

This character also has schizophrenia, and I've had the impression that they consider me to be another voice in their head (turtles all the way down etc), albeit a benign one. I wouldn't necessarily say they trust me, but they seem to accept I'm not actively trying to sabotage their life, so they seem to let me be.

Normally, this sort of chat stays in my head, but I've written down more than I'd thought I did. Mostly because apparently during NaNo2006, I spent more time than strictly necessary writing letters (and getting replies) to my characters. Most of those appear to be flocked though, so I can't link directly.

That said, the most awesome piece of 'discussions with characters' happened in a short story I wrote for the first AugNoWriMo anthology, in which two of my characters turned up, out of nowhere, to tell me that the fantasy land they'd come from, which I'd abandoned some years ago, had been invaded and omg I had to help. D: D: D:

I'll post an excerpt in a reply to this because this comment is long enough as it is, just so you can see what happens when I write meta and let my old original characters back into my head. :D And of course, if there's anything else you want to know, feel free to ask.

A/N: From 'The Train Station At The End Of The Universe' in Milestone, the first AugNo anthology. Lauryhn and Gillian are old original characters from over a decade ago.

The author and Gillian spoke little while they waited for Lauryhn to wake again. They’d both decided it was time to leave and go back to the world the author had neglected in order to set things straight, though quite how the author was going to do this was unclear. Still, Gillian curled up close to the author. They were the one person who could save them and their world.

“Don’t you ever wonder about us?” Gillian said softly.

“Sometimes, but not enough to do anything about it. Too many other characters competing for my attention,” the author said.

“We missed you. We wondered where you went. See, you disappeared too, from our world. I wondered where you were, what you were doing, but Lauryhn couldn’t see you,” Gillian said.

“Yeah, well, I was always fond of you two. Sorry for all the abuse I burdened you with. I wasn’t as good a writer back then as I am now. I’d have done it differently now,” the author said.

“So why don’t you?” Gillian said.

“Not enough time, but I’ll give it some thought. Just don’t leave me with some skerrick of an idea and bugger off again. This is a two way street, you know,” the author said.

The author looked over as Lauryhn shifted and growled quietly. The author pressed a soft kiss to her head as she slept on.

“She’ll be okay, won’t she?” Gillian said.

“Yeah, she’ll be right. It won’t be an easy pregnancy, but she’ll live. I like her too much to let her die,” the author said, glancing over at Gillian.

“That’s good. Will she ever get better?” Gillian said.

“Better in what sense?” the author said.

“Her bloodlust. It hurts. Will it ever leave her?” Gillian said, flinching at the words.

“I don’t know. I really don’t. Sorry,” the author said.

“Please. Do it for me. I don’t like seeing her so troubled,” Gillian said, taking the author’s hand.

“You know that would mean rewriting her history entirely, yes?” the author said.

“You’re the author. It’s not like you don’t control us,” Gillian said.

“How did you even know you had an author?” the author said.

Gillian thought for a moment. “You know, I can’t even remember anymore, but we both knew we had to find you. You were the only one who could save us and our world. Your world.”

“At least it was you two who turned up. Not sure I’d have appreciated some of the others,” the author said, neglecting to mention names.

“S-some of them died. I’m sorry,” Gillian said.

“We’ll see what the situation’s like when we get there, okay? Some things might be reversible,” the author said.

This is both charming and brain-breakingly meta in it's own way. I love brain-breaking meta.

I think that...

“Not enough time, but I’ll give it some thought. Just don’t leave me with some skerrick of an idea and bugger off again. This is a two way street, you know,” the author said.

Really sums up the topic at hand.

Ikr? I hadn't really planned it, they just turned up. But I kind of blame the story itself, as it was a train station where characters get taken when their authors abandoned their worlds. They weren't all my characters, I borrowed some and made a few up too, but there were a few there that were my old characters. It was a lovely, if brain-breaking, piece of metafiction. :D

Yeah, I think you're right there. That's pretty much how I feel with regards to characters turning up to talk to me. You want me to write for you? Then don't just say something and disappear. A bit of commitment would be nice, kthnx.

No bones about fanfic here. I've written pounds of the stuff.

And I've won three NaNos. ...my goodness. Having a cast that takes charge and narrates their own epics come NaNo time! Do you finish in the first week XD? Regardless, please pardon my jealousy.

I have never had a single character, OC or otherwise, say one damn word to me. So, this experience of having them do it is so alien verses my perceptions of How Writing Works. I'm so happy that you took the time to describe this to me. How they talk to you and what they want.

You have more than one muse? Is there a favorite, or are they all pretty cool? (I know someone who has 4ish which she relates to via physical objects.) Alas, for my muse is also metaphorical. Or possibly a cactus stump carved with sear words.

I would tend to think it would be very difficult to manage a cast with which you can't always have the last word, let alone several large casts. But, I'm starting to see based on the responses so far- people seem to be pretty OK with this situation. Do you mind not being absolutely in charge?

Were the gender neutral pronouns in question Spivaks? I'm working on something I believe requires Spivaks and so I'm wondering how they worked out if so.

Srsly, two days into my first NaNo, the plan had been thrown out the window (almost literally!) and I had instead of some sort of Evil Clone Villain thing, I had a dystopian epic with winged humans. :D? My characters thought this was hilarious.

Yeah, I always assumed every writer experienced this, but from my lurkings on the NaNo boards, I discovered this wasn't the case. But I'm also Pagan, and I have my Gods speak to me too, so perhaps I'm just primed for hearing voices anyway, whereas others aren't so primed. I've had to learn to distinguish between characters and Gods and omg is that hard work. o.o But I've managed so far.

I started with one Muse, and through various machinations, I ended up with four. But they've mostly gone a bit silent now, and I tend to work out all my Muse pain over at

musing_way now, so perhaps that's got them all off my mind now. I don't necessarily miss them much either, because they're still kind of there, and others have sort of stepped in to take their place, but then I got glomped by three actual Greek Muses and I think that's made them a bit redundant. So. XD

Honestly, not being totally in charge is kind of better. Sometimes, the main cause of my writer's block is that my characters hate where it's going and only when they step in and change it do I get to continue. So I've learnt to sit back and let them guide me as I'm writing, to see what the story is that they want to tell, not the story I'd like to tell about them.

Actually, no, it was xe/xem/xyrs, not Spivak. It's a mid-70s AU, and as far as I've been able to tell, those pronouns weren't really around then, but this character took one look at them and adopted them, and as I began working on the second draft, insisted I change their pronouns from male to xe/xem/xyr throughout the narrative. (Xe's FAAB, half-transitioned to male, genderqueer, and an Angel. Xe has a lot of fun with xyr therapist who has only half an idea of how to treat xyr properly. Angels don't have genders, y'see, but xe feels pressured to accept male to prove xe's not just delusional about not being female.)

I've actually been thinking about how to use these pronouns throughout the story. It's mainly from xyr POV, and the compromise I've come up with is to use them, and have xyr attempt to correct them, and slowly introduce them that way. Xe has to discuss them with a friend anyway, and explaining xyr pronoun choices to him is sort of a proxy guide to explaining them to the reader. Particularly with regards to pronunciation, because xe wanted ones that looked weird, so we went with x's. I'm going with a ze/zem/zir sort of pronunciation though, just because it seems more intuitive than the way I initially wanted to pronounce them, based on more of a Chinese sort of thing. Does that help you at all? I've never used gender-neutral pronouns so extensively before, it's for a big bang, and I want to make it accessible as well as keeping my character's queerness there in the narrative. Xe gave me the impression that using male pronouns for xem was erasing xyr queerness, so I felt I had to change it so I didn't do that. Xyr queerness is very important to xyr and xe wanted it to be more obvious.

Yeah, I find I need to hear their voices, particularly if they're not Australian like me, so I can write them better. I need to have a good impression of how they speak to be able to write them properly, at least for me, so that's partly why I tend to hear fanfic characters a lot as well as OCs.

I sometimes get those sort of impressions and feelings too, but not very often. I think they're too subtle for me to pick up on half the time, so my characters tend to talk instead. But it does happen. I can't say it's happened often enough for me to be able to distinguish whether it's easier to interpret based on OCs or fanfic characters, though.

I hear characters both fanfic and original in my head. They normally talk when I'm watching t.v., in a boring class, in a class I need to pay attention in, but Adam is pouting at me and it's like "Fine I'll listen to you.", the bathroom, and really anyplace where I'm not doing something that needs my full attention.

Normally my fanfic characters and OCs normally have I say about three places that they can talk in. Most of the time they're in a meeting room with the fanfic characters on one side and the OC characters on the other.

Me (at the center): Alright, today I have many fanfic things to write so I can only do an original drabble today.

(grumbles from the OC side while there are smug smiles over at the fanfic side)

Issac: That's not fair! No one knows who I am yet and how awesome and sexy I am. (frowns and nods)

Danny: I agree. You have all this info on us and you won't write it. You'd rather write [i]them[/i]. (rolls eyes)

Me: I'm sorry, but you knew I signed up for four fandom things. It has to be done first.

Adam: Can't you juggle it like normal? People don't know me and I'm the main character. I'm sure people think the story is about my parents with the number of pieces you write on them.

Bernard and Alene smiles sheepishly and for once Bernard is quiet.

Me: (sighs) I can't help that their past is fun and exciting. You're fun too Adam, but people need to know where that fun came from.

Adam: (grumbles) I guess so.

Zero: (pats Adam's arm in a comforting way) Can there be more stories about me and my family? How about some more about me and Adam?

Christophe: What about me and Albert?

Adam: Isn't he on your lap?

Christophe: (waves it away) That's not the point. The point is we need more stories about us.

Albert is currently silent in all this. While Susie fly around and smiles, teasing Albert about being in Chris' lap.

Susie: I'm a ghost an awesome ghost. Therefore, I need a fic about me.

Me: (opens my mouth to speak when another character pops in)

Angelique: Can I have a fic? Me and Sebastian are okay now.

Adam: That's because you wore out the desk in your office.

Angelique: Shut it! (turns to me) I want more fic.

Kia: Me too!

Bello and Enzi nods in agreement as the room explodes into an argument on the OC side over who wants a fic. However characters from my other two possibly three canons join in and then it becomes talks about AUs, crossovers, and possible random person in this canon. This normally continues until I agree to write something with all of them or I make a schedule or write some prompts that will be about them.

Besides the office, they like to meet in a lounge which has a bar in it, and a big Mansion where everyone lives in, except for Tsukino and her friends. They stay in an apartment complex next to the mansion, but they frequent the lounge all the time.

Most of the time I have to ask them how are things. Because if one muse is sad then oh boy they get the spotlight. They drive me crazy sometimes, but if I ever stopped hearing them it would scare me.

I don't know how it works for everyone else, but this is how it works for me and I like it. I love my OC characters too even if they constantly argue with the fanfic ones.

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There's A Direct Connection Between My Love and Inspiration

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And this is what happens when they talk to me

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